We're 10dpo and still nada, took another internet cheapie today and didn't even get the faint line, no matter how hard I squinted at it or what light I held it against it was just the one line. That meant I had to dig yesterdays test out of the trash and make sure I wasn't imagining the line I saw (I wasn't, and there is a little color to it so I don't think it's evap) I'm not sure what yesterday's was but I'm just calling it a fluke until i get proof otherwise.
Today's obsession is about our prepaid vials. I've been stalking my online banking and there hasn't been a charge on my bank account yet for the two vials we paid for on Friday. I've had no luck getting the sperm bank on the phone but I also haven't been able to try too hard because it isn't exactly a call I can make from my desk. The little architecture firm I work at would go absolutely nuts with gossip if they overheard that conversation! I ended up sending Joanne (the lady at the sperm bank I've been working with) an email asking her to confirm and I'll just hope for the best. I do think some of it may be my bank (the money kind), the groceries we paid for on Saturday and DH's paycheck that was deposited today haven't posted either.
So now I think I'll obsess about random things like how many times I can get DH to go to Kroger to get Sobe Lifewater while they are still $0.50 each (limit 10 per purchase...I've already sent him in there 4 times in two days). DH is pretty tired of going to the grocery store & my kitchen is starting to look like the beverage aisle at Costco.
Maybe tomorrows test will bring back the faint line and I can go back to obsessing about that.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Keeping the HPT industry in business & torturing myself at the same time
I told myself I wasn't going to start testing until 12dpo (that will be Wednesday). Well... I'm weak willed. I have this package of cheap test I bought off the internet last time (MUCH cheaper than anything you can get in a store) and tested this morning. I'm 9dpo today and the odds of getting a positive at that point are pretty slim.
I took a couple tests earlier in the week to make sure the trigger shot was out of my system but today I got the faintest of lines. I haven't even said anything to DH yet because I know it could have been evap or just a flaw in the cheap test but it's making me hopeful.
I really want to go out and buy an expensive digital test but DH and I made plans to spend the day together. I don't want to tell him why because I don't want him to get excited. I guess I'll wait until tomorrow and test again.
More later.
I took a couple tests earlier in the week to make sure the trigger shot was out of my system but today I got the faintest of lines. I haven't even said anything to DH yet because I know it could have been evap or just a flaw in the cheap test but it's making me hopeful.
I really want to go out and buy an expensive digital test but DH and I made plans to spend the day together. I don't want to tell him why because I don't want him to get excited. I guess I'll wait until tomorrow and test again.
More later.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Symptom Shopping
I've reached 8dpo and my least favorite part of the 2ww, the part where my brain starts giving me early pregnancy symptoms. So far I've got fatigue, naseau, metal mouth, achy boobs and a headache. I think if I were to read about another common symptom I'd have it within hours. One cycle I read a post about a woman who can always tell she's pg because she gets a cold sore. I was 3 dpo when I read that and at 5 dpo I had a cold sore and was convinced we were pregnant (we weren't). It's so cruel that we have to wait and try not to obsess (yeah right) for two weeks.
On another note, I just read an article about a high school in Memphis with 90 pregnant students. How frustrating, those babies are not equipped with the skills, resources or maturity to raise children. DH and I started trying over two years ago and God blesses 90 teenagers in one school but not us. I hate reading stuff like this, I know I can't try to rationalize why them and not us, it's a trip down a rabbit hole that I really don't need to be in but how can you help not to think about it when you read crap like that. Ironically, I was reading to try to get my brain off the 2ww.
More later...
On another note, I just read an article about a high school in Memphis with 90 pregnant students. How frustrating, those babies are not equipped with the skills, resources or maturity to raise children. DH and I started trying over two years ago and God blesses 90 teenagers in one school but not us. I hate reading stuff like this, I know I can't try to rationalize why them and not us, it's a trip down a rabbit hole that I really don't need to be in but how can you help not to think about it when you read crap like that. Ironically, I was reading to try to get my brain off the 2ww.
More later...
Thursday, January 27, 2011
WTF?
So - we're still waiting until we can test next week. In the mean time it seems all hell has broken loose at the sperm bank we've been using. Apparently they are closing indefinitely for 'reorganization'. Some of the women I know who also use this bank have done some digging around and found out that they are filing for bankruptcy. I had a long talk with the woman I've been working with there yesterday and apparently we can prepay for 2 vials anytime before the end of the day on Monday and they will ship while they are closed, they just aren't taking new orders.
I like the woman that we've been working with, I don't think she'd intentionally mislead us but the whole thing has me nervous. We don't even know if this cycle has worked yet or not and if it hasn't I really don't want to deal with finding out we've wasted $400 prepaying for vials that we can't get on top of trying to find another bank, I don't think I could handle that.
seriously - I'm so tired of trying to conceive, I'm beginning to take this personally, this is the last straw in a long list of shit we've dealt with in the two years we've been trying. I really hope all this stress is a preamble for us getting a positive next week and all this stress is for nothing. I'd happily waste $400 on sperm we don't need because we're pregnant.
I like the woman that we've been working with, I don't think she'd intentionally mislead us but the whole thing has me nervous. We don't even know if this cycle has worked yet or not and if it hasn't I really don't want to deal with finding out we've wasted $400 prepaying for vials that we can't get on top of trying to find another bank, I don't think I could handle that.
seriously - I'm so tired of trying to conceive, I'm beginning to take this personally, this is the last straw in a long list of shit we've dealt with in the two years we've been trying. I really hope all this stress is a preamble for us getting a positive next week and all this stress is for nothing. I'd happily waste $400 on sperm we don't need because we're pregnant.
Friday, January 21, 2011
Back in the 2WW
Well, we had our first IUI this morning. Yesterday's ultrasound showed two follicles, one at 18 and one at 20. We did the trigger shot yesterday morning and came back this morning for the IUI. The nurse that did the procedure was blown away by the counts so we're encouraged. Next weekend we'll start testing to see if the trigger shot has gone away (it's the same hormone as your body makes if you're pregnant and stays in your body for 6 - 12 days & can lead some women to think they're pregnant when they're not). We should know sometime around the first of the month if we're pregnant.
Financially this has been an expensive month. Here's a breakdown of what we've spent this cycle trying to get pregnant:
Consultation (follow up from initial eval & recommended course of treatment) $205.00
Femara (fertility med) $175
Ovidrel (trigger shot) $65
Donor Sperm & shipping $250
Ultrasound $250
IUI & Sperm Prep $278
Total that up and we've spent over $1200 this month trying to get pregnant. We paid about $400 out of pocket and used our flex account to cover the rest. We set aside $2500 this year for medical expenses but will need some of that to cover our deductible when we do get pregnant. At this point we don't care, we'll make whatever payments necessary to get our baby. We've been trying for just over two years now and before consulting a specialist had spent at least $5,000 on donor sperm and meds through my ob/gyn. Hubby and I have a running joke comparing all our expenses to those American Express priceless ads ('drugs - $175, ultrasound - $250, baby - priceless)
Crossing everything in hopes that the next time you hear from me I'll be telling you we're pregnant!
Financially this has been an expensive month. Here's a breakdown of what we've spent this cycle trying to get pregnant:
Consultation (follow up from initial eval & recommended course of treatment) $205.00
Femara (fertility med) $175
Ovidrel (trigger shot) $65
Donor Sperm & shipping $250
Ultrasound $250
IUI & Sperm Prep $278
Total that up and we've spent over $1200 this month trying to get pregnant. We paid about $400 out of pocket and used our flex account to cover the rest. We set aside $2500 this year for medical expenses but will need some of that to cover our deductible when we do get pregnant. At this point we don't care, we'll make whatever payments necessary to get our baby. We've been trying for just over two years now and before consulting a specialist had spent at least $5,000 on donor sperm and meds through my ob/gyn. Hubby and I have a running joke comparing all our expenses to those American Express priceless ads ('drugs - $175, ultrasound - $250, baby - priceless)
Crossing everything in hopes that the next time you hear from me I'll be telling you we're pregnant!
Saturday, January 15, 2011
About us
Hubby and I have been TTC for a little over 2 years now. At the end of his last marriage he had a vasectomy. Instead of spending a lot of time and money trying to get it reversed (which was not likely to work since it had been so long) we decided to go with an anonymous donor. We spent months looking at different banks and finally chose one of the smaller ones out of Chicago.
After about 9 or 10 failed attempts at home we decided to move on to seeing a specialist and hopefully getting an IUI (intrauterine insemination). The day before Thanksgiving we met with her, talked a little, got an ultrasound of my lady parts and gave 8 vials of blood. We scheduled a follow up and were really disappointed when the soonest they could get us in was late January (it's the only RE's office in our city so they stay pretty busy). A couple weeks after that first appointment they asked us to come in for a SHG (sonohystogram) to get a better look at a fibroid I have. We had the SHG done right before Christmas - OUCH! but the ultrasound tech says I have "a beautiful uterus" (her words not mine).
Last week we went in to review all the results. Not sure why but that morning I had a need to feel extra feminine (lots of make up, heels, etc) I was terrified there was going to be some kind of catastrophic reason why I wasn't getting pregnant. Luckily, everything came back great. The fibroid is small and out of the way and all my bloodwork comes back where it should. We are still working to keep my hypothyroidism in check but otherwise everything looks good.
She suggested we do IUI with Femara and trigger shot. The femara should help me produce more/better eggs and the trigger controls the timing (I'll ovulate 24 -36 hours after the shot is given). I started the femara yesterday, so far just slightly achy and my fingers swelled up pretty badly today but not other side effects. When we were working with my ObGyn and doing home insems I took clomid for a couple cycles and I was a BITCH so I think hubby likes this med better (even though its so much more expensive!)
So, Thursday morning we go in for an ultrasound and if I have a big enough follicle I'll get the trigger shot and we'll do the IUI next Friday.
With any luck I'll be on here in about 3 weeks telling everyone we're pregnant.
After about 9 or 10 failed attempts at home we decided to move on to seeing a specialist and hopefully getting an IUI (intrauterine insemination). The day before Thanksgiving we met with her, talked a little, got an ultrasound of my lady parts and gave 8 vials of blood. We scheduled a follow up and were really disappointed when the soonest they could get us in was late January (it's the only RE's office in our city so they stay pretty busy). A couple weeks after that first appointment they asked us to come in for a SHG (sonohystogram) to get a better look at a fibroid I have. We had the SHG done right before Christmas - OUCH! but the ultrasound tech says I have "a beautiful uterus" (her words not mine).
Last week we went in to review all the results. Not sure why but that morning I had a need to feel extra feminine (lots of make up, heels, etc) I was terrified there was going to be some kind of catastrophic reason why I wasn't getting pregnant. Luckily, everything came back great. The fibroid is small and out of the way and all my bloodwork comes back where it should. We are still working to keep my hypothyroidism in check but otherwise everything looks good.
She suggested we do IUI with Femara and trigger shot. The femara should help me produce more/better eggs and the trigger controls the timing (I'll ovulate 24 -36 hours after the shot is given). I started the femara yesterday, so far just slightly achy and my fingers swelled up pretty badly today but not other side effects. When we were working with my ObGyn and doing home insems I took clomid for a couple cycles and I was a BITCH so I think hubby likes this med better (even though its so much more expensive!)
So, Thursday morning we go in for an ultrasound and if I have a big enough follicle I'll get the trigger shot and we'll do the IUI next Friday.
With any luck I'll be on here in about 3 weeks telling everyone we're pregnant.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)