For the record, I pretty much held it together while writing the last post... Until the end....admitting that this isn't and may never work to anyone, much less myself was extraordinarily painful, it brought on an ugly cry. But sooner or later you have to stop crying. Once you do, your heart heals over a little and protects you from the pain. One long talk with my husband later and we have a plan. Our plan is to meet with our doctor and talk about timing and estrogen levels and the benefit of back-to-back insems instead of the single insemination we've been doing. We need a different approach.
Ultimately we decided that we are going to find a way to make this happen, even if that means relocating to a state that has mandated fertility coverage, if that's what it takes, sign me up.
For those of you that reached out after last posts meltdown I appreciate it, your support, especially those of you who have some experience with has kept me sane (well, somewhat)
Okay, so the laptop I've been using while on bedrest totally didn't allow me to post anything on your blog for some stupid reason (tried to on somebody else's too, and no luck). :( I wrote something very lovely to you after your last September post and I'm sorry it didn't apply it. Essentially, my heart ached (and still does) for you. I'm glad to hear you've got a plan worked out with hubby and that you're planning to take more charge rather than a back seat. :) It really can't hurt and in the end, you'll know you did everything you could and that counts for a lot and doesn't lead to regret and "what if's". Again, I'm sorry it didn't let me post before, but I've been watching and rooting for you and praying for you. xoxo
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